Ghetto Gurls update

I think I'm going to make this a regular post...

Ghetto Gurls episode 3:

2 actors lgg (little ghetto gurl) and bgg (big ghetto gurl)

It's a cold rainy day outside. Stupidity is running high between the two of them. A new fax/printer/copier has been placed at the front of our row. Everyone has been using it everyday. Lgg approaches the fax machine with worry in her eyes. She stunk the place up with the smell of fear of new technology and collard greens. Her hand shaking as she touched the new machine...then the stupidity flew out of her mouth. First it was what side of the paper should be face up...even though it tells you on the tray. I guess bgg needed to get involved because as soon as the words came out of lgg, all I heard were thighs scraping together as bgg runs up to her side. Then the real stupidity started to flow. It was like their two stupid brains united to create one big ol' dump ass. So bgg was all like "gurl, I crud not fugger this machine out. I don't knows why theys even put it up hurr. Theys needs to us a crash curse on this machine." I'm sitting here trying to not laugh because I don't know why you need a crash course on this machine when the buttons on the screen tell you what to do. if you want to fax you push the fax button. If you want to copy press the copy button. It's super hard! So after I walk lgg through the process of faxing, she said thank you cause she would have never figured it out...and they both walked back to their desk to talk about their love life.

Now I can't hear what they were saying, but I'm pretty sure I would have thrown up. bgg is just that big. Have you ever watched discovery channel during whale week? Well I picture bgg having sex like two whales...NO WANTS TO EVER THINK ABOUT THAT...

Please stay tuned for more episodes of Ghetto Gurls!

dear gym rat wannabes

Dear Gym Rat Wannabes,

I think it's great that your New Year goals are to tone up and lose weight, and I think that's great. I think it's awesome that you care enough to put your self in some torn up clothes, put a head band around your big ol forehead and get on that treadmill. To see sweat not dripping down your face encourages me to work harder. If you can set that treadmill speed at 2.5 and get your mall walking on...I say...GET THE HELL OFF THE ONLY TREADMILL I EVER USE!

Look wannabes, I'm going to need you to take your fat ass and go to another gym or just stop eating altogether. For the rest of us that work out year round...you hear that WB, the gym is open year around...girl (that's for brian). The gym doesn't close after Jan 15 each year and then re-opens Jan 1 of the following year. Oh no, there are some of use that actually worry about our weight and/or want to get tone all year round. If you're to scared to get sweaty, or go faster than 2.5 on the treadmill, then you're wasting my time and water. How are you wasting water...well fat ass, your half hearted attempt to lose the weight only adds more clothing to your laundry. More laundry you're washing means more water...so do me and mother earth a favor and STOP PRETENDING...that love handle you're trying to hide...you know the one that is sticking out of your "think this is appropriate workout gear" isn't going anywhere...embrace it...just get the hell off the machines I use!

Pissed part 3

So today is no better than yesterday, actually it's gotten just a little bit worse. I still have yet to find out what the reasoning is other than I'm to laid back, then I find out again, i'm to social. Today I found out that the new team they're adding to our group is going to have a team lead as well, but that position has been filled by one of the people that's coming over. I can't even get considered for a TL position on my OWN team. How messed up is that? Seriously, I have been on this project for a year now, and there is someone more qualified to be a new team lead over here. Just because he is coming from his other department as a team lead. Big deal, we have to girls on this team now that were team leads when they came over...they're not leads over here.

What really gets me about this is the fact that I split my team between the two teams here now. I have trained several people on this both teams on how do to stuff. I think I have gone above and beyond over there. God I even sound like a cry baby to myself, but guess what it's my blog and I will cry if I want to.

I think it's time to do some career searching. Something new, something different. Something a lot better than this. Should I look at going back to school? Should I look starting a business? I guess I could follow in the sperm donor's line of work and become a drug dealer...I here there is ALOT of money in that field. I couldn't be a porn start, and I'm not mean enough to be a pimp. Cause the first time you didn't pay me, that would be a bullet in your right leg. Then that would effect the money more because I could only charge half on a gimp!

Pissed part 2

Ok so I have had time to think, to actually go run and get some of that anger out but it didn't really help. The more I think about it and the bull shit excuse, the more mad I get. I hope there is a better reason for not getting the position other than "to laid back". I hope there is something that I lack or I'm weak in an area that I can improve on. That way I could be like "oh ok" and move on. That's something I can change, if it's an area where I'm weak or unskilled, I can do something about that. But it's just because I'm to fucking laid back...I'm going to go ape shit on these people. I'm sorry if I don't want to fun around here with a stick up my ass. calm down matt Surely there is another reason...cause the laid back is a trait that I enjoy having. Sorry I don't get that stressed out over things, doesn't mean that because I don't, I don't get the job done. Sorry if I stay calm or laugh a lot or crack jokes, doesn't mean that I goof off. I'm just trying to make everyone have some kind of fun in this stupid ass job that sucks, that doesn't know what CUSTOMER SERVICE IS...even thought that's what we're supposed to be doing. This company sucks, but I try and laugh and make others laugh so it's not such a chore to come into this rats nest of an office...doesn't mean that I goof off. I wonder if there are any competitors here in houston that is hiring. What a big F U to Ikon if I did jump ship...after they trained me for five years. The knowledge about how they treat customer would probably benefit someone else. Why isn't this rant and raving making me feel better? What's sad is the feed back is coming from people that I thought were friends. Not like BFFs or anything like that, but just friends and that's what really hurts! 4 o'clock isn't going to get here fast enough!

Pissed doesn't even begin to say what I am right now

I'm so pissed off right now. I was passed up on for a promotion because I was to laid back. Last time I applied for this position, I was to social and that was why I was passed up. I don't get it, those are bad qualities? I would think you would want someone that didn't get stressed out, didn't let things really bother them as a manager. Someone that was calm and collected. Someone that had the skills and knowledge to get the job done. I'm so pissed off I can't even finish this blog!

ADHD

It seems that since I have stopped smoking...well still in the process of it, but doing very well...thank you. Sorry, ok so I think my smoking covered up the ADHD I have. It seems that the more I go without a smoke the worse it gets. I mean like really bad. So bad I have been writting this blog for about two hours now...it's 11 and I can't stay focused. I will start working something and if I have another thought train pull into the station, I'm screwed. Music calms the beast but only if I'm paying attention to my work and the song playing. If the stog stops my mind goes in five different places at once. Just that thought alone is scary. I didn't know I had the power to entertain 5 different thoughts at one time. The only bad thing is I lose my place on usually the first three thoughts I got going on, so when I tried to go back to them, they're gone...gone. I wonder if the mullet should be brought back...thoughts, opinions on that?

Lazy people!!!

Lazy are starting to piss me off. I'm not talking about the "I have worked all week, so I'm going to lay around want relax this weekend lazy" I'm not talking about the "I really don't want to do the laundry tonight, wear something that doesn't smell that bad tomorrow" kind of lazy. I'm talking about the lazy ass people that will wait for someone to stop using something they need, when there are more of those things available. Here is what happened this morning and I really don't care for this person anyways. So this person is making their breakfast but needs the microwave. There are 4 microwaves in the break room. Another person was using the microwave closest to the the sink and coffee makers. A few feet away is three more microwaves. I kid you not if this lazy ass person sets her food down next the microwave that someone is using to wait to use that same microwave. Are you effin kidding me! Take your fat ass and walk the extra few steps to the next 3 microwaves. That oatmeal you're eating coupled with the walking you would have to do to the other 3 would probably help you lose more of that fat ass. You know that fat ass you're trying to lose so you're eating oatmeal everyday!

Seriously, you will sit there for 3 minutes waiting when you could have walked over, used the next microwave in the same amount of time, and been out of my damn way. Instead, you stand there in my way while I'm to get my morning coffee talking about something stupid I'm sure. Probably about how eating oatmeal is really making you healthy. News flash fat ass, if you're just eating oatmeal, it's not doing THAT much to make you healthy. Now if you had said that AFTER walking to the next microwave, I wouldn't have had to blog about you're lazy ass.

People, go the extra mile or feet to do something. Those extra steps could be all it takes to fitting into those pair of jeans you haven't worn since high school. Ok that might be a stretch! How about this, just do it so I don't have to blog about your lazy ass! HA happy Monday morning!