Do you think it's us??

Last night Brian and I sat down to really talk about this adoption thing. I don't know if we're just to the point where we are ready for this to be over with or if there is a legitimate reason we're feeling this way. It seems that we continue to hit road blocks with CPS. Our casework is the one lady that I had to get a little short with...that was before we knew she was going to be our case worker. We requested information last Monday and I just sent a follow up email to our case worker to see what the deal was. Well last night me and brian talked about the fact that maybe we're getting the run around because we're gay...I know big shocker that we're gay. I get that not everyone agrees with it, hell there are people in my family that don't agree with it. Do they treat me and brian different no. If that's the only reason, then CPS is actually hurting themselves. Yeah I understand that it's not the "norm" to have a house with two dads, but really in today's culture should that really be an issue. Shouldn't we be looked at more as, wow there are two people that want to take children into their home and provide a safe, warm, and loving place. A place that wants the struggles of being parents and to give someone a chance. We're not looking for a pat on the back or anything like that. Just treat us fair, and I'm not sure CPS is doing that. If we could afford 20-30k to do private adoption then yeah it would be a much better option for us. I just get so frustrated sometimes because I know that Brian and I will be great dads, great parents but it's road block after road block. What really pisses me off is that these people that keep popping out babies don't even want them, but we have issues getting placed with one of those children. Where is the fairness in that? Yes I am very impatient, I always have been but damn when we meet with our case worker we were told "there has been an influx of babies in the system" and yet our case study hasn't been submitted once. I think I have gotten to the point where I'm just rambling on.

Not that it's ever really going to happen but part of me is ready to just give up. No kids, me and brian could travel more. We could lay out all night if we want, or pick up and go on a road trip. Wouldn't have to worry about another person but us. Yeah just keep the house full of dogs and we would be set. I know I'm just frustrated and everyone said this is how it was going to be. Maybe I can become a hooker and save enough money for private adoption.